Thing was, Colton couldn't sleep on it. Sure, he was an ass. Sure, he wanted to see Ratter look so uncomfortable, so humiliated, so broken. He wanted that reaction from Ratter's father.

But he was still moral and he knew what he had done was bad. Was wrong.

Guilt kept him up all day and most of the evening. He was lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling, blankets crumpled around him, eyes shadowed with exhaustion. He blinked lathargically at the spider in the corner and watched the dim flicker of shadows and light play across the sterile, white ceiling.

He had half a heart to apologize.

Then again, Ratter never apologized to him.

And this thought played back and forth. Who had to make the first move? Take the first step? Who had the bigger balls here?

"Sir? Shall I continue work on these?"

Polite. Respectful.

Blank.

Dead.

Ratter is not happy. Ratter is as far from happy as you can get.

He loved his father, you know.

He's around the corner, outside the door, not intruding on the personal space.

He's talking about the administrative cases, if you were wondering.

Colton sighed lightly from where he lay.

"No, Ratter."

His answer was soft, apologetic in tone. But he still wasn't saying sorry.

Colton appeared in his door frame, looking slightly ashamed.

"Don't have to do those."

And, really? He has nothing else to say. He's out of bed because he cant sleep anyway.

"Yessir."

Softly.

Ratter isn't looking at him. He's studying the wall.

"I'll leave you alone then, sir."

"No--"

He was too quick to respond. Sounded desperate.

Colt covered himself with a cough. Obviously fake. Really, it covered nothing.

"Um. No, Ratter. You don't... Have to leave."

And now he sounded gay. And he was already feeling way too disgusting about that.

"Er. I'm sorry, kay?"

And, he sounds bashful, hasty, and completely insincere.

Ratter thinks about this silently for a while.

What did it really change? Nothing much, really.

"Thanks, I suppose." A faint hint of a smile, gone before it appeared. "It doesn't help much, but thanks."

It's a nice gesture on your part.

And that's frustrating, because, by all laws of nature, an apology is supposed to make everything better.

"Look, just... Tell your dad I was on something. Or... Whatever."

Colton's still watching the ground. It's far less offensive than watching Ratter.

"Just... Tell him whatever. I don't care."

But, see, he doesn't get it. The damage has been done.

That gets a chuckle out of the vampire.

"You don't get it."

Pause.

"My da doesn't give second chances."

Yes. That means all that it implies.

Thus Ratter's mood.

And now Colton's feeling more guilty. Feeling angry. Feeling scared.

"Well, you're his son! He has to listen to you!"

His dad wouldn't listen to him if he confessed his sexuality... How was this different?

It wasn't, except that Ratter wasn't gay. He shouldn't have to deal with being disowned. But now he had to, and why?

Because Colton is an ass.

"Just call him... Or... Something... Please."

And he doesn't want to live with being an ass for the rest of his existance.

"No, he really doesn't. He never bothered, and he wouldn't bother now."

Shrug.

"I don't like talking about it. May I leave, sir?"

Spirit? Soul? Personality?

Sorry. No.