The following quotes are taken from one-star reviews that members of the public have written on Amazon.com

Using your skill and judgment, simply NAME the album, book or film that they are talking about. Spelling mistakes are the authors' own.

Points will be awarded for intelligent guesses, partially correct answers and near-misses.

If I suspect that you have Googled, you will receive no points. No correspondence will be entered into. I have my eye on three people in particular. Your statutory rights will very much be affected.

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1. One of the great pleasures of seeing this film in the theatre was the lush green of the English countryside. This print (or pressing) looks like it was abandoned on a deck chair in the south of France ... dry and faded. Women In Love - Fritter

2. most of the music is about drug's, it's okay if you are def. Tin Machine s/t - Audrey Wetherspoon

3. Gee! This book is absolutely dreadful. I must admit, though, that once I had gotten over the initial shock I read it from cover to cover. Now, America, if you had any illusions about the British working class, prepare to shed them now: we have trailer parks too you know. Being Jordan by Katie Price - Hiccup Percy

4. I'm open-minded and come from a punk background. I kept waiting for this movie to get better and hoping for some kind of plot to wrap my head around. I personally thought neither came to fruition. Most of the music was awesome and was a reprieve from the rest of the movie. I am sad that I lost 2 hours of my life watching this pointless movie. Velvet Goldmine - biggestlibraryyet

5. This guy was just a joke, absurdity for the sake of nothing. Frank Zappa used to get pretty bizarre with his shows in the 60's but at least he always had some intelligent political point. This guy is just trying to get attention from the kiddies by doing gross stuff and putting dirty words on CDs. Pretty lame if you ask me. ???? by GG Allin - Fritter

6. A friend of mine told me that you had to be a man to appreciate this book. Perhaps so, because the character and the story held no interest for me. I read other reviews that say the story-line was suspenseful. I did not find that. In fact, I put the book away with 50 pages to go because I was so bored and genuinely did not care what happened to our hero. The style was certainly original, but not Booker Prize material. How late it was, how late by James Kelman - A Worried Man

7. I can't believe i spent a few good hours of my life reading this book. And I simply don't understand why it's getting so many good reviews. This book is just a spin-off of the truly great father-boy relation book Kramer vs. Kramer. The original book was touching and left me in tears. This book left me in tears because it was so cliche and so incredibly boring. It's not even well-written. This book is a combination of every possible cliche out there. I yet have to understand the kind of people who loved this book. Maybe i'm better off not trying to understand them at all.Man And Boy by Tony Parsons - A Worried Man

8. Her voice is beautiful, but the songs are poorly written. I listened to the whole cd and don't plan on doing it again. I would not suggest purchasing this album, it isn't worth the 15.00$. It's Not Me It's You - Audrey Wetherspoon (points deducted for Googling)

9. You think the movie industry doesn't allow any genuinely awful films to be made these days? Think again. You HAVE to check this one out. Sex Lives Of The Potato Men - Fritter

10. Only Hollywood could turn the senseless death of over a thousand people into a love story. Titanic - Audrey Wetherspoon

11. I have listened to each of these overly-honeyed, contrived-mellifluous songs multiple times. I have occasionally been able to get through the entire album without chain smoking or resorting to cheap vodka. I just can't do it. I can't bring myself to call this album anything more than what it is: hackery. Sheer, total hackery. Fleet Foxes s/t - A Worried Man

12. Maybe they still have it in them for a resurgence. Maybe this lackluster affair will be the impetus. They need a producer that takes a more gestalt approach. Lock the guys in a room, make them sweat it out as a band. No drum machines, loops, samples, cut & paste... just play some doggone heartfelt rock music. No Line On The Horizon by U2 - Fritter/Audrey Wetherspoon

13. What a piece of garbage. If this is the future of American fiction, then we are all in for one gigantic aesthetic collapse. American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis - biggestlibraryyet

14. The boy's a fool, just like his father. Koba The Dread by Martin Amis - A Worried Man/biggestlibraryyet

15. Buy this album if you want a good laugh at the expense of someone whose inherent instability was pushed over the edge by a diet of good strong mind-altering drugs. Play it for your kids to scare them off doing drugs themselves. But don't call this genius - this is no more genius than Yoko Ono is genius. The Madcap Laughs by Syd Barrett - Audrey Wetherspoon

16. It is a prooven fact my dad told me that it were always the spotty rascals who (LOL) were lissening to this stommach turning racket of these untalented wildcats. Tommy by The Who - Audrey Wetherspoon

17. The plot of this movie would have made a great Grand Guingnol one-act, --cumulating E.C. Comics tag line included--but O mama, TWO HOURS? Two hours of relentless brutality, SLOOOOW pans, and that SINGING? The Cook the Thief His Wife and Her Lover - Audrey Wetherspoon

18. All right, the only reason why I watched this movie is because my uncle thought it was better than the first. It's totally unrealistic, and the scar thing is totally stupid. WAY too many attacks. Jaws 2 - biggestlibraryyet

19. We couldn't believe how unfunny it was. The acting was awlful. The actors seemed to be trying to hard to sell their lines. There was some good writing in it, but it was so forced, I kept waitng for it to be beleiveable but it never was. Usually if I buy a DVD that costs 10 dollars or less I'm not too shocked that it sucks, but at the price this DVD is, I couldn't belive how bad it is. "The Hidden Fortress" was funnier. Withnail And I - Audrey Wetherspoon

20. This book is the worst sort of worshipful rock criticism imaginable. Perhaps worst of all, the text occasionally dissolves into a scattershot impressionism of style in a pathetic attempt to mirror that of his idol. [It] would make a great 30 paged xeroxed handout. If you're interested in going a little bit further into what is a very rich subject, write your own book. The Fall by Mark E. Smith & Mick Middles - Reformed Marmot/Audrey Wetherspoon


POINTS THUS FAR SO FAR:


biggestlibraryyet - 19
Audrey Wetherspoon - 18
A Worried Man - 17
Fritter - 12
Hiccup Percy - 6
Buy Kurious! - 2
Reformed Marmot - 1
duckpin - 1

More bonus points may follow...

5 - Marilyn Manson

10 -Twister

11 - A Bobby Goldsboro LP

14 - Lenny Kravitz

4. The Great Rock n Roll Swindle.

16 - Twisted Sister

10. Titanic

20 - Carbureator Dung

I never seem to get any of your questions right so here's some more fun for you and humiliation for me

Help BK Help!

3 - Jordan's autobiography.

10. Pearl Harbor?

4 - Withnail & I

CORRECT!

Five points.

Some good guesses so far. I might give out a bonus point or two...

13 - American Psycho?

This quiz is a bitch!

Very hard, I googled and still nothing.
I deserve no points :ohdear:

7. The Road?

CORRECT. It's entitled Being Jordan.

Four points seems fair.

12. Achtung Baby by U2.

CORRECT.

Three points, since you neglected to mention an author.

13. American Psycho

(edit: damn too slow)

Hmmm.

Wrong... but interestingly so.

Bret Easton Ellis you pedant!

Is 17 The Others?

6 -And The Ass Saw The Angel - Nick Cave

20. The Fallen

20. Shakey by Jimmy McDonough

Semi-CORRECT. You have the band.

Two points.

Another two available for anyone who can name the right album.

14. Grace by Jeff Buckley

7. About A Boy?

Interestingly as in warm? Or interestingly as in I forgot your bonus point Mr P? :whistle:

15. The Madcap Laughs by Syd Barrett

11. Life For Rent - Dido

Pop

These are very good guesses...

However, I shall only respond to correct(ish) answers.

No Line On The Horizon

6. Trainspotting?

Hmmm...

One point.

1. Tess.

1. Barry Lyndon