For my first showing of my Work...i will show you what i have done so far in my Story 'THE WARRIOR'

Long ago in ancient Japan...a peace loving land...where no evil existed, a proud king, (King Tameyoshi of the Hiyama royal family) said goodbye to his people as he went off on his annual trip. He left in a beautifully decorated cart pulled by 12 horses. His people crowded the streets waving goodbye. Tameyoshi's wife, Satomi and his son (the prince) Hitoshi waved from one of the palaces many balconys. "When does dad come back?" Hitoshi asked. "it is the same time every year son" said Satomi "and you ask this question every time he leaves on his trip". "But i forget!" Hitoshi said "hey!"
"what?" asked Satomi.
"Where DOES dad go every year?" He said.
"Hey look! you friend Gohan is out playing in the field! why don't you go and join him?" She said. Hitoshi looked back over his shoulder, out the balcony and into a field, he saw Gohan Practising His pole fighting. Hitoshi looked back at his mother, but she had left the room. "Humph!" he said as he looked back at the sliding door with a suspicous look on his face. He walked up to the door for a run up and jumped out of the balcony! He landed on a tree, ran a long the long branch and picked up his pole that he hides there, and ran onto another branch. As he ran towards the tip of it, it lowered, So he just walked off it.
He sneaked up to his friends and attacked Gohan really fast! He quickly turned around and blocked his attack and went strait for Hitoshi's knees. He blocked, when suddenly, Tsubasa (his other best friend) appeared to come from no-where and went for his back! Hitshi blocked his attack, pushed Tsubasa back and whacked Gohan on the head from behind him.
"I have got to hand it to you Hitoshi, we'll never beat you! You are the best Pole fighter i know!" Said Tsubasa. "Mabye" Said Gohan, "But do you have to hit so hard?" "I apologize...here" Hitoshi held his hand out to help gohan to his feet"
"hey i know!" Shouted Tsubasa "Lets go stone skipping at the lake!" They ran down the hill and hid their poles in some bushes, then set off down the dirt track road towards Green Lake. As you get a certain distance down the road, there is a secret turn-off point through the hedges. 5 horses live in this field. The kids love to stroke them and feed them. As they pass through the field, there is a pathway through the woods. They walk through there, stopping off at the apple tree (as usual). Gohan is always good at climbing this tree. He climbs right to the top, where the good apples are! “wow! That was some fast climbing Gohan!” Shouted Tsubasa from the ground. Gohan dropped the apples while Tsubasa and Hitoshi caught them. He and Tsubasa put them in their bags, then set of thorugh the wood, while Gohan was following them by jumping from branch to branch. When they got their it was mid-day, and they were hungry, so they sat down with their feet in the cool water and ate the apples, while skipping stones. Hitoshi got one to skip twice, but Tsubasa was always the best at stone skipping. He always boasts that he got one to skip 8 times! But Hitoshi and Gohan think he is lying.
"Wow! i'm amazed that my best friend is the prince! the future king of this land!" Said Tsubasa. "Will we still be friends then?" He asked.
"Sure...we will always be friends. All 3 of us. For ever and ever" Said Hitoshi.
"Yeah!" Shouted Gohan with exitement. "hey, will we get special privilages when you are king?" Tsubasa asked.
"What do you mean by that?" Hitoshi asked.
"Well...you know...like twisting the rules and stuff, like if we broke the law...well it wouldn't be the law to us...What would you do if someone brakes the law when you are king?"
"OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!" Hitoshi shouted.
"You arn't gettin my head!" said Gohan.
"Oh yeah? well we'll see about that!" laughed Hitoshi as he chased Gohan and Tsubasa trying to claim their heads. Tsubasa picked up a stone and throwed it at Hitoshi. He knocked it away with ease and said, "Are you challenging me?"
"Mabye..." Said Tsubasa.
"Do you wanna...?" Said Hitoshi.
"The usual?" Asked Tsubasa.
"Yeah" Said Hitoshi.
"You two want to race AGAIN!?" Asked Gohan "Fine, you know the route, down the hill and across the river, up into the old abandoned part of town, up to the wooden tower and dive back into the river and run up to..." Gohan scratched a line in the ground with a stone "...this line. The rules are: NO CUTTING CORNERS, i saw you last time Hitoshi, missing out that second corner!."
"yeah well even if he doesn't cheat, he still wins!" Shouted Tsubasa.
"Well its not my fault! Hey, do you guys just LET me win...because i'm the prince?" He said.
"No!" Shouted Tsubasa.
"Oh i bet you do!" Said Hitoshi.
"Don't!"
"Do!"
"Don't!"
"Do!"
"Don't!"
"Hey, are you challenging me?!" Shouted Hitoshi.
"He already Challenged you!" Shouted Gohan.

YES...I KNOW...Hitoshi's LIFE MAY SEEM SIMPLE, EASY, RELAXING...LITTLE DID HE KNOW...IT WAS ABOUT TO GET A WHOLE LOT WORSE.

"OK! 3! 2! 1!...GO!" Shouted Gohan. Hitoshi and Tsubasa started off even when suddenly, Hitoshi tripped and fell over. Tsubasa looked behind him and stopped running. He ran of to Hitoshi.
"Hitoshi! Hitoshi! are you alright!?" shouted Tsubasa.
He came and knelt down beside him.
"did you hurt yourself?" asked Tsubasa. Suddenly, Hitoshi ran away fast, laughing!
"He tricked me!" he said, and carried on running. Tsubasa skipped a corner, climbed onto a roof and ran to the top. He could see the whole abandoned town from here. Including...Hitoshi! Hitoshi was running really fast! thought Tsubasa. He looked towards the waterfall, and saw a clear way all the way there! He just kept running. Jumping from roof to roof. He suddenly came to a stop, walked to the edge of the roof and looked over it. To his left, was the waterfall, and Hitoshi running towards it. Tsubasa dived off the the roof of the building at the same time hitoshi dived off the waterfall. They were grining at eachother as they were falling.
"I'm gonna win!" shouted Tsubasa!
"Tsubasa! luft ejjfuflfg!" shouted Hitoshi. Tsubasa couldn't understand what he was saying because of the wind against his ears.
"luft ejjfuflfg!!!"....It must of been important. Because Hitoshi was screaming it really loud with a horrified face at this point.....CRACK!......Tsubasa landed head first in a rock pool. Hitoshi landed safely in the pool of water and swam over to the rocks and climbed out. He ran over Tsubasa, and knelt down by his side, and rested his head on his lap.
“Did I win?” said Tsubasa in a very faint voice.
"TSUBASA! I SHOUTED! I WARNED YOU OF THE ROCKS! COULDN'T YOU HEAR ME!!!?" Said Hitoshi frantically.
"i...i...i...couldn't hear...y..y.y.ou" Said Tsubasa very faintly.
"GOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!" shouted Hitoshi at the top of his voice. It echoed all up the waterfall and over through the abandoned place. Hitoshi looked up at top of the waterfall, in hope that Gohan heard him. Suddenly, a figure came into to view over the waterfall, getting closer and closer. SPLASH! Gohan swam to the side and leant over the rocks.
"Whats the matter?" He said. He looked at Tsubasa,fainted and sank into the water! He suddenly climbed out coughing, and ran over to Tsubasa.
"Did he fall onto the rocks?" asked Gohan.
"Yes..but he can better...right?" said Hitoshi. Gohan stared at Hitoshi.
"NO! I don't want one of my best friends to die! I won't let it!" Shouted Hitoshi, "HEY!"
"Whats the matter?" asked Gohan.
"I dive off the waterfall every day to wake myself up in the mornings. But these rocks have never been here!” Shouted Hitoshi.
"Well," said Gohan "i hardly every come down here, so i wouldn't know if-
"Whats that!?" Shouted Hitoshi. He pointed towards the forest. A hooded figure in a dark purple cloak was stood there. Then he suddenly ran into the forest.
"I bet he did this! I bet he put these rocks here with a spell" Said Hitoshi as he got up.
"Take Tsubasa back to the village Gohan!" shouted hitoshi as he ran off into the forest. He chased the hooded figure all the way through the forest untill they got to the edge. Hitoshi turned around quickly. He caught a glimpse of him run into a town. Hitoshi quickly followed. The town streets were full of market stalls and Merchant selling rubbish things for ridiculous prices. You had people selling 'Pau-pou' fruit for 20 wong. (thats like selling an apple for £2 (WONG is the currency)) (a pau-pou fruit is a star shaped yellow fruit that is very juicy) Hitoshi lost the mysterious figure in the market stalls. He saw a Purple cloak go around a corner. As he got there, all he found was the cloak lying on the floor.
"Grrr. Now that he's abandoned his cloak, he won't stand out anymore! how do i find him now!?" Said Hitoshi angryly. "Hmm, that golden leaf clip that was holding his cloak together is gone, he must of taken it with him.
Hitoshi ran back to the village, to find Tsubasa lying on a table in his house.
“Goodbye…Hit…Hi…toshi” Said Tsubasa. Tsubasa’s head went down slowly and his eyes closed. Tsubasa was dead.
“Yes Tsubasa…you won” said Hitoshi.

2 DAYS LATER

"I can't beleive that Tsubasa is dead" said Gohan.
"Yeah, I even promised him that we 3 would be friends for ever." Said Hitoshi.
"Oh yeah..." Said Gohan. Just then, Kimiko, the cutest girl in the village came around the corner. Everyone freezes on the spot and has a blank stare when she comes near. Just like what Hitoshi and Gohan have now.
"Hi Gohan. Hi Hitoshi" she said.
"H...h...H...hih...he...he...hello. Said Hitoshi. When she had gone, they relaxed.
"I've got a brilliant idea!" said Gohan.
"what?"
"Lets go for a walk by the river!" Said Gohan excidedly.
"And look for mushrooms on the way?" Asked Hitoshi.
"That was Tsubasa’s favorite thing to do. Go for a stroll by the river and look for mushrooms to eat" Said Gohan. So they went off towards the river.
A bit later on. About 10 minuites, they start to hear funny noises.
"What IS that noise?" asked Hitoshi. As they carried on walking, the funny blurred noises turned into a blurred chanting noise.
"Who is saying that?" asked Gohan. "I know! lets follow it!....it...it's what Tsubasa would have done..." Said Gohan.
"Great idea Gohan!" Said Hitoshi. They carried on walking until they came to a cliff face.
“Grrr” Said Gohan, “We’ll never know that sound is now!”
“I know!” said Hitoshi “ We’ll go and get Ryoko’s Grandfather! He is the wisest person in the village!”
“That’s weird! I thought you wanted him for his skills in ancient magic and psychic powers…” Said Gohan.
“Oh, and that to” Said Hitoshi. Soon after, Gohan and Hitoshi returned to the cliff face with Ryoko’s grandfather, Roshi. They were telling him about the funny noise, and the fact that they want to cross the gorge. As Gohan explained, Hitoshi caught sight of that LEAF CLIP that the hooded figure was wearing on his cloak.
“You! You placed those rocks there! You killed Tsubasa…you!...you…y.” Shouted Hitoshi.
“I was just making the place look a bit nicer!” said Roshi in a slow way (as if he was 90….well actually he’s 91 but that doesn’t matter).
“What do you mean by that?! Asked Gohan.
“Well this place is kind of…plain. You know, a lot of the trees are dead in the forest by the waterfall, no flowers…nothing! I just thought that some rocks would be nice! Roshi stood up and stared into space. “I am sorry. I didn’t know he was going to dive off!” He waved his staff, and a bridge appeared. It led them to the other side. The path came to a point where it split in to. One went to the left, and the other to the right. But the kids ran off to the left. This is the way the chanting is coming from Hitoshi! Shouted Gohan. The kid ran around the corner, quickly stopped, and ran back around the corner to hide. Suddenly, a bearded man appeared in the sky and landed on the ground. He looked funny. Funny as if your TV isn’t tuned in properly. “Go away! Leave this place! Gohan! Hitoshi! The fate of the world depends on it! Remember this sword!” Said the man. The man held up his sword to Hitoshi. Then he disappeared. “o.....kay...that was spooky” Said Gohan.
“Yeah, how did he know our names? So!? It’s just a sword!” Said Hitoshi. ”I wasn’t going to go in there, but since he told us not to, I’m tempted.”
Hitoshi walked in and shouted, “What are you doing!?” Everyone looked around and stopped chanting. The was a moment of utter silence, then...
“How can we seal a demon if we don’t chant!? Start again now or else this demon will escap..HITOSHI!?” Hitoshi looked over to see…his father! King Tameyoshi!
“Dad!” Then, the stone box in the middle of the circular room exploded! Out came, a demon! “Ahhhh.” Said the creature. “15,000 years cooped up in that puny little box doesn’t help your back!” The king, Hitoshi, and the chanters slowly backed off. Tameyoshi drew his sword and launched at the creature while its back was turned. One of the chanters was holding Hitoshi’s mouth, to stop him screaming. The demon quickly grabbed him, and shoved his sword into his stomach! “Agghh!” shouted the king as he landed on the ground. Hitoshi ran over to his father. “Father! Father! Are you alright!?!” Then he saw that he had a sword through him. “Oh father! What has he done to you!?” said Hitoshi, panicking.
“Son” He said in a faint voice. “Take this sword.”
“But father! This is your best sword!” Shouted Hitoshi! The demon looked around and charged at Tameyohshi.
“Quick! Son! Take it! Care for it always! It is now your sword!” Hitoshi ran out of the way as the demon scooped up Tameyoshi. “Tell your mother that I love her very much!” shouted Tameyoshi. The demons grip on the king got tighter and tighter until…CRUCH!
“Father!!” Screamed Hitoshi. He ran, picked up his father’s sword and ran towards the demon! “This is for dad!” shouted Hitoshi as he started attacking the demon!

“Aggggggghhh!!” shouted the demon. “This is a magic sword! It has some kind of magic charm on it!” The demon ran off! Hitoshi stood there looking at the sword. This is the sword that floating man was holding! It has the same initials on it!

T.H.

“That’s my fathers initials! But how can this be? How can he have the same sword?”

15 YEARS LATER...THE DEMON IS STILL RULING THE EARTH. GOHAN, HITOSHI’S MOTHER AND MANY MORE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN KILLED.
NO-ONE CAN LAY EVEN A SCRATCH ON THIS EVIL ENTITY!

“Aggghhh!!” screamed hitoshi as he striked a rock with his father’s sword. Now, Hitoshi is 24 years old, he has been in training for years. He can’t get those horrific images out of his head...

“Son” He said in a faint voice.“Take this sword.”
“But father! This is your best sword!” Shouted Hitoshi! The demon looked around and charged at Tameyohshi. “Quick! Son! Take it! Care for it always! It is now your sword!” Hitoshi ran out of the way as the demon scooped up Tameyoshi. “Tell your mother that I love her very much!” shouted Tameyoshi. The demons grip on the king got tighter and tighter until...

“It is still hard to believe that that was 15 years ago.” He said to himself, as he looked up into the beautiful morning sky. “The countryside is so beautiful this time of year, the tree’s are blossoming, the birds are singing, and there are lots more animals being born” He walked down the stream and stopped to see a patch of mushrooms...

“Come on!” shouted Tsubasa. “it’s just around the corner!” Tsubasa ran around the corner to find a patch of mushrooms. “Father says that these are alright to eat! They’re not poisonous! Go on, try some!”. “MUSHROOMS!?” Shouted Gohan, angrily. “You got Hitoshi and I up at 03:00am to look at some mushrooms?!” “Well they ARE Tasty!” said Tsubasa...

“It was Tsubasa’s favourite thing to do...its a pity he had to get us up at THAT time of the morning though!” Hitoshi let out a little giggle, but at the same time...a tear.
He had crossed the bridge that Roshi layed down year ago, and went towards the once beautiful city. The ‘old abandoned part of town’ that he once new as a child wasn’t even there anymore! He took a deep sigh and walked over towards the Entrance to his City. The big gates aren’t even there any more. He just walked in. Voices and memories of a once bustling busy high street rushed through his mind...


“PAU-POU FRUITS! GET YOUR PAU-POU FRUITS!”
“Hello young lad! Would you like to buy a horse?” ‘No thanks’ Hitoshi would answer. “Hey you’re the kings lad aren’t you!?”
“well…um”
“Well would you like a FREE horse then?”
“well you see, I have about 15 ponys, not including Dad’s 5 fully grown horses”


“Hahaha, all I wanted to do is see if Tsubasa was in! I got hassled by at least 10 people! Now I see why Father hardly ever left the palace!” Hitoshi walked though the city and out the other ‘Gates’. He walked to the top of the hill outside his palace. He looked down the path, and just to the left some hedges. To his surprise, the wooden poles where still lying there, in the bushes. He took then with him. He sat down in the cool shade of a tree. He gathered sticks, stones and other bits and pieces, and started a fire. He placed His, Gohan’s and Tsubasa’s fighting poles in a Triangle and placed them on the fire as a sign of respect. He placed them in a triangle to show their everlasting friend ship. The triangle isn’t complete if it is missing one side. Their friendship circle cannot exist if it is missing someone.
Hitoshi walked towards a cave, and stood outside it, looking up in the sky, where that weird floating man appeared. “Why didn’t I do as you said!? Who were you!? How did you know our names?!” He said in an angry and sad voice. “If I had only obeyed you! Then the world wouldn’t be like this! Well I’m going to do something about it!” Hitoshi looked up into the sky. “I’ll do it for Mom and Dad.” He walked off towards the waterfall.
By now it was mid-day, and Hitoshi was hungry.

That is as much as i have done at the moment... B)

IV'E EDITED THIS A BIT, BECAUSE......I WANTED TO

B)

I'm sorry but I cannot be bothered to read alll of that. It'll take me two days! Guess I better start reading..

U like?

I read the first paragraph its good but why have you got a character called Gohan? Dragonball Rip off! Ummm sorry. Its OK though.

I can't think of good names! I mostly copy names:

Tsubasa=Megatokyo
Gohan = DBZ, DBGT,
Roshi (Master Roshi) =DB, DBZ
Asakura (Yo Asakura)=Shamen King

I'm gonna do a piccy of Chi from Chobits soon. I'll post it wen iv'e done it.

(Thats not my piccy...just to show you what she looks like)

Eugh what kind of a picture is that. She looks like Britney in her new video. And if you publish your book, expect to get sued by all four of those!

Well not copy THAT picture. Just her face down to about shoulder level or sumthing. i can't draw female eyes though...bummer.

well the names sound good now. When it comes to it (if it does) i'l just change the names! In fact, i'll just change the sounds! (Roshi becomes Rashi etc)

You can't do female eyes? Just draw eyelashes!

Well Anime/Manga eyes are alot more detailed that circles and dots in the middle! They are very complex and have lots of colours mixed together!

anyway, i don't know how to put this...urm...Imagine my Story as a plane trip. The Plane hasn't taken off into the air yet! Its gonna be big.

Women in anime look softer and better because they don't just have eyelashes and lipstick

Keep up the hard work you're doing.

Try not to copy so many names, you won't get sued unless you make the character like that of the one you took the name from.

Using the name of an established character can make it harder for you in developing that charatcer.

Oh, and try to refrain from using capital letters outside of speech, unless it's a 2 years later... heading. It looks better. :)

yeah, listen to the Teacher! teacher ferret, he he he!

Thanks. It's just that i can't think up names that sound Japanese! I'll have to research some Japanese name....Thats how i found the name 'Hitoshi'.

You r right ferret, if u copy a name from another character, it makes you think th@ YOUR charactor looks and even SOUNDS like the one you copied from!

You can't do a totally solid story without research if you take a setting like ancient Japan.

If you create your own worlds, even then you need reserch. I do quite a lot on swords, armour, weaponry from the medevil time, that I can adapt for my book...comes in handy for drama too.....

what do you mean what kind of pic is that! !!!
its a half naked manga chick!!!!!!
now if you dont mind i am going to dribbel.


*drool*


muchh better. more tea Giles?

Its cartoons. :mm:

No, its not.....you just can't say its cartoons' !!!

OK Its a picture then. :D

its not. manga is not a picture or a cartoon. its art. some people love things like this more than they could ever love anything that is real.
please do not call manga 'just cartoons', because manga is skillful beautiful and something wich i would give anything i own to be able to draw.
manga is a way of life, manga is fantastic, and its for life, not just for christmas

Twerp.

berk.

Moron.

ok, thats enough.
*is not mentioning the 'whats more important part of manga when your drunk' thing from last week*

Well if Vivi is suposably a lesbien, how come she doesn't like the picture?!

I'm not a lesbian! Does anyone listen to me around here? Its a silly thing Abbs made up so he could get all of you to bully me.

But you are, aren't you?

Heheheheheheh........

No I'm not. Why did Tenchi have to bring this up anyways? Now wheres that picture of the tart?

So now you do want to see it?

i dunno...i can't do the eyes! to me, eyes r everything. if there are no eyes, then there's no point!

I just want to see Tenchi's version not perv! Looks like we're not seeing it then. Do some bloke japanese people if you can't get the eyes right.

Vivi, y'know if you didn't react the way you do when you get called a lesbian, people might shut up about it.

Take me. I nod, agree, then shoot back somehting random at people. I don't get all harrassed, so people get bored and go pick on someone who they'll get a reaction out of.

And from personal experience, Abbs isn't bullying you, he's just being a normal brother. Trust me, I've been bullied just about every way possible.

Apparently we brothers are supposed to be like this...

amen...iv'e traced that picture and it looks good...but i'll draw it WITHOUT tracing and then post it. :)

Sounds reasonable.

*Waits*