Brandell vs. Big Pete for the ASWF World Title

The Whore vs. Drunken Phantom vs. Rowdy Roddy Piper for the Hardcore Title

DJ U-Neek vs. The Pebble for the ASWF Pacific Title

The Beef vs. Sonny Bill

Plus we'll see the repurcussions from Mark Read and Trent Bowman's appearance at last week's taping of On Edge, and hear more from Death is Certain after their recent tag team title win

Back stage to every ones amusment the Drunken Phantom, is drunk, wow who would of thought!!
But he has a shopping trolley full of grog, from cartons of beer, bottles of all types of dark spirits and a pogo stick. As our hero is strolling along running into walls knocking of plaster and ruining the paint job he runs into Brandel who seems to be polishing his boots for his up coming ASWF heavy wieght world title match.

Brandel:[COLOR=green] Oi Purple dude thats alot of grog is that for a celebration after your title defence.

Drunken Phantom: um no mate its breakfast, but if i do win, Ill get a shit load of grog and watch your match, it should be a good one.
good luck

Brandel:[COLOR=green]Mate I dont need good luck.

**Kristy is seen waiting outside Dj U-Neeks dressing room knocking furiously on the door trying to get his toughts... suddenly Dj U-Neek opens the door**

Dj U-Neek: Wha!... well hello Kristy, what can i do for you?
Kristy: Well for one you could return my calls but other than that i just want your thoughts on last week and your title shot this week against Pebble
Dj U-Neek: Ohh no no no baby, i wanted to call, but ive been busy all week
Kristy: Doing what?
Dj U-Neek: Well as you know last week i lost to Big Pete, now i dont wanna make excuses to all the U-Neek Freaks out there but last i spent more time thinking of you than i did my match against Big Pete, i wasnt focused enough to win the match, and to Pete credit he was good enough to make me pay. But this week im not making that mistake. Ive been training hard all week, studing the tapes, i know his every move, i know all the advantages i need to know to ensure that this Dj's turntables keep on spinnin, i am the most u-neek athlete in this federation.
Kristy: Speaking of this federation, last week we saw Mark Read and his cronies storm the ASWF, what do you make of that?

**crowed give massive heat**

Dj U-Neek: I dont care if mark read is coming her for some action, to take over or to choke on CBW's CHUNKY PEICES! The LUF invasion in hearing? The only thing they invade is each others back door!! **Crowd errupt in cheers** And if those dounut punchers have something to say about that, Dj's door is always open, they can bring Mark Read, Ian Gorton, Trent Bowman hell they can bring that big steaming pile of monkey shit Pebble, they have nothing on me, I am U-Neek, they like like every other blue collar bum.
Kristy: Well your certainlly confident of a victory tonight Dj
Dj U-Neek: Well Kristy, when your a U-Neek athlete like me, when you've got 1000's apon 1000's of U-Neek freaks out there cheering your name, watchin you do your thing, it's impossible not to get confident.

Make no mistake Kirsty, i am the most U-Neek athlete in this federation or any toher federation and im going to prove that tonight... the smoke will clear, the dust will settle and when its all said and done i will be standing in that ring victorious, holding my Pacific Title high above my head.... can you feel it Kristy? Can you feel it in the air, its going to be a U-Neek night Kristy, U-Neek in every way, so i ask you pebble, what ya gonna do, how are you gonna handle it, when Dj U-Neek the turns the tables on you?

**Dj U-Neek walks back in his dressing room before poking his head out again**

Dj U-neek: and kristy, once i am crowned Pacific champion, you, me and my knewly won title are hittin the town ;)

**Dj goes back into this dressing room as Kristy rushes off to get ready**

Trust me when I say that this week there will be even more of an impact, and thats a promise

OOC: Only a short promo this week....

The scene opens backstage where Sean 'The Assassin' Lawrence and Ray 'Sabre Tooth' Lawrence are sitting in their locker room with the newly won tag team championship belts sitting on the table nearby. A camera shot leads us through the door, where we see the two talking...

Assassin: Yo, Ray, was that not the easiest match of our careers or what? Tag Team champions? No sh*t, we might aswell keep the belts, because aint no body stoppin Death Is Certain...nobody!

Sabre Tooth: Yeah, Sean, I know what you mean. Damn, I havent wrestled any body that easy since...well, since I fought that kid for his ice block, when I was five years old...

Assassin: Hey I remember that, haha. hey you know what is really weird? We made a hug impact on the ASWF, with our signing over. Then we made an even bigger impact when we beat those no hopers for the Tag Titles. Hehe, and after tonight, I dunno if the ASWF can handle another earth quivering moment. They say bad things happen in three...

Sabre Tooth: Either way...this promotion will never be the same...hehe...

The scene fades out to a commercial, with Death Is Certain laughing to themselves, unaware of the camera prescence in the locker room. What could this mean for the ASWF? Find out later on tonight...

*Brandell's limo arrives at the arena and the paparazzi storm the car to get the best picture of Brandell, the door opens and then after a second the photographers are seen being hurled by Brandell as he walks through the crowd*

Brandell: Get your shit out of my way! Doesn't anyone realise that tonight I am claiming back my rightful ASWF title. I am sick of you little peons getting in my face with the f&*king camera.

*One camera man remains but he is well away from Brandell*

Brandell:Come on punk come a little closer. I'll stick my foot so far up your ass you'll be able to taste my baby steps! *Camera man pisses off*

Interviewer: Brandell Brandell! How are you feeling ahead of tonights clash against the unknown Big Pete?

Brandell:Oh you as well, how do I feel? how do you think I feel? I should already have the title this is absolute codswallop. I was the last champion therefore me reign should continue. Bushy should cram his ideas where the sun don't shine.

Interviewer: What are you thoughts on the arrival of Trent Bowman and the leader of the LUF Mark Read?

Brandell: my thoughts? Well if they want to come anywhere near me they can bring that shit on. I'll ditch and dismiss both their pansy asses. I don't know why they were there but I do know this Pete poof comes from LUF they better not interfere with my destiny. Cause Destiny is like me a bitch and we'll slap pansy mummas boy asses like it was a dirty dirty whore. Get out of my way.

*Brandell walks inside*

The areana goes black during the mid-show entertainment of Jet. The commentators go nuts trying to work out what has gone wrong while the ring announcer is trying to calm the fans down.

After about a minute, footage beings to roll on the titan screen

It's a clock, ticking down

70:46:30
70:46:29
70:46:28
70:46:27
70:46:26
70:46:25
70:46:24
70:46:23

the lights arise and the programing returns to normal

*Brandell is sitting infront of the T.V watching the lovely smooth sweet tunesof Jet when the lights go out and the Titanatron hits with the clock and then finishes*

Brandell: Woopdy Doo, Someone is trying to get some attention for a possible appearance. Pfft, Please that was about as gripping as spending a weekend at the Neverland Ranch. Now a true wrestler would never try and win popularity by spending money on flashy little videos. Pfft who cares about the thoughtless mind numbing chants of a few idiots that probably spend eighty five percent of their life infront of a computer. They obviously have no goals in their life and no hope, to me most of these stupid fans are a waste of breath. Tonight I become a two time ASWF champion and etch my name into the history books as one of the greatest wrestlers to grace the squared circle.

Beef is sitting in the dressing room, with his head down and breathing heavily, obviously in deep concrentration of tonights match. Eye of the Tiger is playing loudly

Reporter: Beef, tonight u face up and coming Sonny Bill, who is fast making a name for himself in the ASWF. Your thoughts?

Beef: Doesnt move, not even to face the reporter

I dont speak my thoughts, I speak through actions. Tonight you will see my thoughts in the ring... and so will Sonny Bill

Reporter: You have now lost both of your two matches in the ASWF. What have you got to say about that?

Beef: Once again does not move an inch

The old Beef is 0 and 2. The new Beef is 0 and 0. A fresh start. I have trained harder. I am fitter. I am more committed to myself. The man that wrestles Sonny Bill tonight will not be the same man that is 0 and 2. You shall soon see this. This is the beginning of my dominace of the ASWF. I will not give up. I feel no pain. I will Dominate!

Reporter: You are 0 and 2! How do you expect to dominate if you cant even win a match?

Beef: Finally moves, and all of a sudden jumps to his feet, grabs the reporter by the shirt and pushes him up into the wall.

Listen to me. I WILL DOMINATE! Thats all i have to say about it.

ASWF On Edge, Show Three

The night kicks off with pyros and fanfare as fans in Melbourne go absolutely crazy for the ASWF. Before anything can get underway in the way of matches, some familiar music hits….


*IF YOU SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKING*

*Former WWE champ The Rock surprises Melbourne with a return to the ring*

Finally, The Rock has come back too Melbourne.

The Rock has heard that this ASWF and this LUF are having a little war between themselves. Now the Rock isn’t one to get in involved in other people’s business, but since the Rock is a seven time WWE champ, a two time I.C. champ, a five time WWE Tag Champ, two time WCW champ, and the jabroni beating, pie eating, faster then a bull, stronger then a buck, better then all the wrestlers in the world cause all of them suck .

*Crowd goes nuts*

As well as the People’s Champ. The Rock has come here for one reason and one reason only; too tell both the ASWF and the LUF that the Rock is putting his contract, this shiny new contract on the line for one of the companies to sign. Imagine it, a chance to sign The Rock, a chance to sign the most electrifying man in sports entertainment, a chance to sign the People’s Champion.

*Crowd goes nuts*

*Rock notices camera lady*

Rock: WOAH, WOAH, WOAH, WOAH, what are you looking at camera lady? No, No, No, No there’s no way you’re touching the people’s strudel. The buffet is closed baby.


*Down with the Sickness Hits and out comes the Commissioner of the ASWF*

CWB: It’s good to see you Rock. How you been?
Rock: Well the Rock is all fine and dandy, but the Rock has just one question….Who in the blue hell are you?
CWB: Well Rock I’m The
Rock: IT DOESN’T MATTER WHO YOU ARE! I know who you are. You’re the commissioner here aren’t ya? The boss here, the same boss that is looking to sign The Rock up.
CWB: Well Rock, If you want to be successful you have no other choice besides joining the ASWF
Rock: Let me tell you something you little jabroni, the Rock works for nobody. The Rock just wants to return to the ring to do what he does best and that is to lay the Smackdown on every candy ass.

*Loud Rocky Chant*

The Rock says he hasn’t made a choice on which company he wants to join, wether to join your roody poo company or that Jabroni Mark Read’s Company. But with out a shadow of a doubt which ever company the Rock joins you will SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL What the ROCK……Is cooking

*Rock throws the Microphone Down and Rock bottoms CWB*

As the Crowd goes nuts

*Rock Poses on all 4 corners before he leaves the ring*

Match 1- The Beef vs. Sonny Bill
The Beef looks infinitely more determined going into this match, as if his last two upset defeats have made something inside him snap. He and Sonny Bill exchange blows in a good old fashioned brawler clash, until Sonny Bill gains the advantage by whipping Beef into the corner and then sending him reeling with a big time splash into the corner. Cover gets two. The Beef soon psyches up, Ultimate Warrior style, and starts to beat down on Sonny-Bill, who tries to slow things down with some holds and eye gouges. This only further infuriates The Beef, who soon hits a whip and a bigtime clothesline. Sonny Bill stumbles to his feet, and stumbles right into a Beef Buster! Beef signals for the Top Rope Backflip Slam, but as he ascends the turnbuckle, Rowdy Roddy Piper rushes out! Beef isn’t put off, and instead hits a missile drop-kick on Piper. He rushes back into the ring, but Sonny-Bill is back on his feet. Sonny misses a clothesline, and Beef hits the Beef Surprise! Up top again, and this time he gets his Top Rope Backflip Slam. 1-2-3!
WINNER: The Beef by pinfall in 11:23

A truck like those used by the army pulls up, and in the shadows, a large group of men leap from the covered back and are seen to be sneaking into the arena via a back entrance. Standing at the door, grinning, is Mark Read

Match 2- The Whore vs. Drunken Phantom © vs. Rowdy Roddy Piper for the Hardcore Title
First out is The Whore, who ‘limbers up’ for her match in the most disgusting of ways. Roddy Piper is out next, with the badly beaten Sonny-Bill nowhere to be seen. Last out is crowd-pleasing drunk, the Drunken Phantom. All three start in typical Hardcore fashion, with Piper’s experience shining through as he clocks both Phantom and the Whore with the post from a street-sign. Whore kicks out, however. She soon lights up, and reeks havoc with the lit cigarette- especially on Piper, who is still a little pink from being set on fire by Drunken Phantom last week.

The match continues in the same fashion, and eventually things go Drunken Phantom’s way. Firstly he pushes The Whore off the stage inside his trolley, and then he lays out Piper with a waffle iron. He ascends to the top rope, chugs the contents of a Vodka bottle, sways drunkenly, and falls over Piper to make the cover.
WINNER: Drunken Phantom by pinfall in 8:47

Match 3- DJ U-Neek vs. The Pebble for the Pacific Title
The Pebble actually makes it to his match this time around, and for the early stages of the match, hits some exciting high flying offence. U-Neek’s size advantage soon shows, however, and he begins to take control of the match with some harder hitting moves. Nothing says ‘crisp’ like seeing a three foot tall man tossed in the air with suplexes. Despite it all, The Pebble continually goes close with cheeky little quick pins (schoolboys and sunset flips). Eventually U-Neek manages to corner Pebble, only to cop a blatant head-butt in the crotch! Somehow the ref missed it, and as U-Neek lies on the ground, The Pebble goes up top for the Pebble Toss! Wait a minute, Kristy is ringside, and she gives Pebble a gentle nudge so he slips and crushes his *ahem* pebbles, on the ropes. U-Neek signals for a top rope Turntable, and picks up the win! Kristy rushes into the ring and the two celebrate.
WINNER: DJ U-Neek by pinfall after 7:44

The arena goes black during the mid-show entertainment of Jet. The commentators go nuts trying to work out what has gone wrong while the ring announcer is trying to calm the fans down.

After about a minute, footage beings to roll on the titan screen

It's a clock, ticking down

70:46:30
70:46:29
70:46:28
70:46:27
70:46:26
70:46:25
70:46:24
70:46:23

the lights arise and the programming returns to normal

Match 4- Brandell vs. Big Pete for the ASWF World Title
Brandell comes out first to some major heat, and Big Pete gets a generous face’s pop as he makes his way to the ring. Brandell offers to shake hands, but when Pete accepts, he cops a poke in the eye! The match is underway. Brandell’s early ‘offence’ gains him the advantage, and he gets sound booing as he poses before suplexes and the like. Eventually it comes back to bite him in the ass, as Big Pete reverses a suplex to gain the upper hand. The advantage is short-lived, however, as Brandell’s dirty offence continually regains him control. Brandell makes two near falls, before Big Pete sets hearts aflutter with a dangerously close schoolboy. Brandell stomps on Pete some more, and soon signals for the tea bag. Pete rolls away at the last minute! He then ascends the ring post, and signals for a big flying axe handle. He hits it! Brandell is reeling. Big Pete signals for the tombstone! He’s got Brandell up. He’s got Brandell up! Wait, Brandell’s got something in his hand. It’s a hypodermic needle! He’s stabbed Big Pete in the upper thigh with it. Pete starts to sway, one of his legs give out, and he passes out! Brandell again signals for the tea-bag, and powerless to resist, Big Pete is subjected to it. The referee administers a ten count, and Brandell is declared world champion by knock-out!
WINNER: Brandell by KO in 18:33

As Brandell celebrates his ‘victory’ to the baying of the crowd, a group of men storm the ring. There’s Sean and Ray Lawrence, Trent Bowman, Ian Gorton, and leading them all is Mark Read. Brandell makes a quick escape, but poor Big Pete is still unconscious in the ring.

Read: Quit your booing, you ingrates! (More booing) I’m here tonight to send out a loud message to Chris Walker-Bush and the rest of his ASWF cronies. We, the LUF, are here to perform what you might call a ‘hostile takeover’. We started wrestling downunder, and damned if we’re going to let you sail in and claim it for yourselves. Effective immediately, I’m declaring war on the All-Star Wrestling Federation.
Big Pete stumbles to his feet, still groggy
Read: Pete. You’ve wrestled in the LUF, so I’m giving you an option. Are you going to join us? Or stay in a federation where you’re robbed of the World Title by being drugged?
Pete: I’m… (crowd is tense) What I mean to say is…. (The tension is thick) No Way!
Big Pete begins to lay into Mark Read with punches, but is soon restrained by Sean and Ray Lawrence. Trent Bowman hits a T-Bone Crush! Pete is lifted to his feet by Death is Certain, who double team him in a painful flapjack. Mark Read slaps Big Pete, and soon after, Ian ‘Grappler’ Gorton locks in his Grapple Submission Hold. Big Pete is out cold before DJ U-Neek, Drunken Phantom, The Pebble, and Chris Walker-Bush can come out for the save. The LUF boys quickly free the ring, as paramedics tend to Big Pete.

CWB: Read, you’re here illegally. Officers, I want you to take them away. (Read and his cronies are already fleeing the arena). No matter. If they want war, they’ve got it. Read and his boys either need to sign on as talent, or pay to sit in the audience. Since we already have Death is Certain on the books, let’s book then in a little match. It’ll be Death is Certain vs. Big Pete and DJ U-Neek, with the tag titles on the line. And Read, if you’re game, you’ll face my newest acquisition- Steamroller! (Crowd pops)

**Dj U-Neek is seen in the parking lot with Kristy around one arm and his newly won Pacific title around the other, they get into Dj U-Neek's limo with the words "the best night club in town thanks driver" are herd as DJ and Kristy speed out of the arena**

Sorry about no promo, Internet stuffed up just before I could write it.

Tag team match ey, DJUNEEK and Big Pete side by side, sounds like one explosive tag team.

Also Brandell, you better keep that title nice and shiny as thats the way I want it when I grab it.