LIMMERICK
Sunflowers are yellow,
And roses are red,
If Dave doesn't log off my computer,
He'll wind up quite dead.

HAIKU
Log off my comp please,
You docile piece of doo-doo,
Jelly will fuck you.

ACROSTIC
D on't log off?
J ust lay down so
M y axe will cut your
A rm off without much effort from
C hris, who is hung.

More to come....

The acrostic isn't that good...

A Sestina for Dave

(For everyone, a Sestina is a French style characterised by its repetitions of key words)

Why must you insist on not logging off?
Taunting me with your negligent style,
Before disappearing from the house?
I must warn thee, I am quite mad,
And will soon begin ritualistic slaughter,
Of you, my wanton user of the 'net.

You use my computer to access the 'net,
But, despite my objections, never log out,
So, I am afraid, it is you I must slaughter,
And I will do it in a most gory style,
And those who find you, will think me mad,
For killing you and burying you under the house.

And beneath this very house,
I will bury you for neglecting the 'net,
Because, truth be told, it drives me mad,
This refusal of yours to log off,
As if it were a habit that's in style,
It, I am afraid, will drive me to slaughter.

How could you avoid this slaughter?
How to avoid being buried beneath this house?
Avoid a murder of a most heinous style?
I tell thee, log off after you use the 'net,
I repeat my request: remember to log off,
Only then will you avoid driving me mad.

Or maybe I'm already considered mad,
For isn't it a sure sign of that, when I crave slaughter?
Perhaps my sanity is a little off,
But that would come from sharing a house
With a many who refuses to respect the 'net,
And instead plays by his own style.

Mayhap I will follow your style,
Drive you until you go quite mad,
But my revenge will not come via the 'net,
Nor will it take on the form of barbaric slaughter,
What could I do to disgust you in this house?
I won't clean up after I beat off!

So, I request you use the 'net in my style,
That you should log off and avoid my going mad,
For you do not want slaughter in this house.

EXPLANATION: For all the laymen

The repeated word pattern is as follows.
1 2 3 4 5 6 - End words of lines in first sestet.
6 1 5 2 4 3 - End words of lines in second sestet.
3 6 4 1 2 5 - End words of lines in third sestet.
5 3 2 6 1 4 - End words of lines in fourth sestet.
4 5 1 3 6 2 - End words of lines in fifth sestet.
2 4 6 5 3 1 - End words of lines in sixth sestet.
(6 2) (1 4) (5 3) - Middle and end words of lines in tercet.

jesus christ you must be bored :huh:

lol, yep. Plus I like writing sestinas.

Chris